I’m feeling pissy. So I’ll post some pretty pictures.
Photo not labeled in slideshow are from Terry Bison Ranch in Cheyenne, Wyoming. The ones with the farm animals and wide open spaces and big sky. Yep, that’s Wyoming.
I found out yesterday I have to go back to the drawing board for my thesis. I don’t totally have to redo it, but I have to reorganize, restructure and also think about it differently. I guess.
My thesis advisor told me my Writer’s Notes are where my voice is — where the story is, instead of my essays that focus on capturing the beauty and love of motherhood. My advisor sees this thesis (the essays and writer’s notes) eventually as a book. Plus 9 months of pregnancy before that and years of infertility.
Right now, I just have to get 50 pages ready for my thesis and that means thesis quality. I had 65 pages of essays for first draft of thesis and 75 pages of Writer’s Notes.
But how do I pick just fifty pages when I have gone through so much in the last 18 months. My thesis is on motherhood. It feels like trying to stuff the ocean in a sandbag.
Pretty picture: (Can’t resist an opportunity for a picture of the ocean!)
* Writer’s Notes = basically a diary/journal on being a stay at home mom and pretty much raw, honest, unfiltered rants (because who seriously writes in a diary when they are feeling super happy and content, at least I don’t. I enjoy the feeling of happy and do what happy people do – I do things.)
My thesis advisor told me my Writer’s Notes are where my voice is — where the story is, instead of my essays that focus on capturing the beauty and love of motherhood.
The thing is, I’m honest, but I’m not sure if I really want to be that honest… ya know…at least on paper that gets bound in a book with my name on it.
Here is a pretty picture:
More pretty pictures:
So I will ignore the wet floor in the bathroom where my toddler poured cups of water from his Tasmanian Devil cup onto the floor. I will ignore the laundry, so badly in need of doing, that there are no clean towels to clean up the wet floor in the bathroom, and I am wearing an outfit I would wear to work as a teacher (although I made the decision to quit my job last year around this time to stay home with my son). I usually wear yoga pants and the same red sweater. I have a mom uniform I usually wear too – jeans and the same black long sleeve shirt.
What I can’t ignore is my toddler’s need for food. So we’ll be back. Maybe I won’t be so damn pissy.
Later in the day and not so pissy…
FYI: Momzilla didn’t deserve this, but my husband, came home for lunch and I was napping with toddler (feeling sorry for myself and my damn thesis) and husband cleaned the kitchen while I napped extra. I just laid in bed and felt sorry for myself. But sometimes you just have to wallow.
I’ll go back to the thesis and figure out how to scramble those eggs. On a good note: my thesis advisor is preparing me for the caliber of writing that is needed to get published in the real world. On a pissy note – my thesis is due before Christmas break. So there really aren’t enough photos to post to punch through that pissiness. But here is one final pretty picture, because tomorrow is another day. And I do have an amazing husband and son. And a great group of friends and family to help me crack some eggs!